• Confidentiality
• (what’s said here stays here)
• Non-judgemental / Withholding judgement
• Mobile phones on silent please
• Respect one another's names and pronouns
• Respect diversity of ideas, identities & experiences
  This can include: Diversity of experiences with, or interest in, sex and the subject matter
• “Don’t yuck my yum”
  (don’t make others feel bad for liking different things than you)
• Respect one another's boundaries
• One person speaks at a time
• Step Up / Step back (if you tend to speak more, challenge yourself to ‘step back’ to let others speak. If you tend to be more quiet, challenge yourself to ‘step up’ to speak)
• No pressure to Disclose / Permission to pass
• Permission to pause
• There is no such thing as a stupid question (all questions are welcome)

🤲 ACTIVITIES TO USE:
(choose one) :

- What is Sex? (15 mins)
- Sex Talk (30 - 45 mins)

📗 DEFINITION
Sex can be anything that makes you feel good sexually. There is more to sex than just penetrative sex. People have sex for many reasons. One reason to have sex is to make babies, but most of the time it is for pleasure or to connect with another person.

• Sex is traditionally associated with penis-in-vagina sexual intercourse or penetrative sex more broadly (including anal sex) — but it’s more diverse than that.
• It includes a wide range of physical acts, including vaginal, anal, oral, digital (sometimes called fingering) and manual (often called a hand job or masturbation for solo sex).
• Sex refers to any act that makes you feel good sexually.
• Knowing about sex or different sexual practices doesn’t mean anything about the person who has said it.
• Sex can take place for many reasons: one is to make babies, but the more common one is to connect with another person and experience sexual pleasure
• Sex and physical intimacy can also include other acts that create a sense of sexual pleasure, without needing to lead to intercourse. For example, some people might enjoy having their ears rubbed or their neck being kissed.

🤲 ACTIVITIES TO USE:
(choose one) :

- Sex Talk (30 - 45 mins)

• Pleasure is a vital part of sex and for this to happen, we need to think about how this might differ for different people.
• Not all bodies are the same — so what works for you, might not work for another person, and vice versa.
• It can be a journey to figure out what’s pleasurable for you, or you and a partner, but that’s that’s OK so long as you communicate openly and gain your partner’s consent to explore different types of sex. It’s also OK to change your mind about what you like, or don’t like, at any point.
• Sex can look like and mean many different things to many different people, and all of this is OK, so long as the sex you’re having is fair, ethical and equal.

🤲 ACTIVITIES TO USE:
(choose one):

- Values Circle (30 mins)

📗 DEFINITION
Ethical sex is doing right by yourself and others, living by your values, while still enjoying your sexuality in a way that is unique to you, fun and fair for everyone involved.

We know that some of the stuff we see in porn can be a bit toxic. But for a lot of people this is their main way of learning about what to expect when it comes to sex and intimacy. Living by your values and making sex fun and fair for everyone involved is called ‘ethical’ sex.

Ethical sex is sex that is:

• Consenting and respectful
  This means anything that happens (including touching, kissing, sexy messages) is based on active and ongoing negotiation of consent. It’s about being clear about your own boundaries, and respecting others’ boundaries. Respecting your partner if and when they say “No”, and not pressuring them into anything they do not want to do. It means knowing that you are allowed to say “No” and equally knowing that you are allowed to say “Yes”.

• Based on good communication
  This means listening to what your partner needs and wants, and negotiating what works for both of you. It means being open and available to communicate before, during and after sex. It means learning what you want from your partner and feeling safe to share that.

• Unique to everyone across the gender and sexuality spectrum
  Again, you do you. Even though certain types of sex get a lot more airtime in mainstream sex ed and porn, there is a whole range of things that make up people’s sexual practice. Types of sex and what turns you on is unique to you. As long as it doesn’t hurt anyone, no one should tell you what you are allowed and not allowed to enjoy.

• Aiming for mutual pleasure
  In our culture, male pleasure can be prioritised. This has resulted in an ‘orgasm gap’ where men are much more likely to reach orgasm during sex than women. Regardless of your sex or gender, aiming for mutual pleasure means aiming for equality. Different things feel good for different people based on their body and preferences. Communicate to figure out what that is and make it good for everyone. This means not being a ‘selfish lover’ but also not consistently putting someone else's pleasure above your own.

• Practised in a safe and healthy way
  This means acting with the best interests of yourself and your partner at heart. Practising safer sex to reduce the likelihood of getting STIs. And if you are sexually active, it also means getting regular STI tests from a sexual health clinic. It also means talking about and practising sex that doesn’t lead to unwanted pregnancy (in other words, using contraception).